Musings of the Deranged

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?

Like really, what was that all about? Trying to seek my attention? Oh come on. Grow up please! Were you trying to plot a plan that would let all people assume we are already together? That is just plain stupidity. Oh i know the word. DESPERATE. It’s a turn-off just so you know; when you’re an attention-seeker. Were you thinking that i would comment on that status update? Oh no, you did not?

Well, it just so happens that I already knew you’re hidden agenda. You’re not going to get me, nor my full attention. Apparently, i’m engaged with my thesis and we are about to get married in the next couple of months. So don’t bother me anymore with your naive problems and childish musings because I am not about to waste my time delving on such unimportant issues.

Sana ma-realize mo na never ko naging intention na paasahin at saktan ka dahil hindi ako ganoong tao. Hindi ko hinahangad na makasakit ng kapwa. Nagkataon lang talaga na hindi mo nakuha ng husto ang mga mensaheng nais koing ipahiwatig o sadyang nilulubos mo lang talaga ang katangahan mo, hindi ko alam. Sorry. Sorry kung ito man ang kinalabasan ng lahat. Sana naiintindihan mo na mahirap din sa parte ko ang mag-desisyon sa mga bagay-bagay na may kinalaman sa “relasyon” natin.

Kaibigan kita. At importante ka sa akin. Pero hindi ko masusuklian ng equal yung mga pinaggagawa mo sa akin. I could not give you what you want and  we both know that already. It just bothers me why you still do all these things ba.

Gaya ng sinabi ko kay Abey kanina, ayoko ikaw i-confront at sabihin sayo na tapusin na ang lahat ng kabaliwan na ito kasi alam ko yung feeling na ni-reject at ayaw ko na maramdaman mo yun. Kasi ang sakit sakit. Sobrang sakit.

Ay ewan ko ui. Tsk. Makatulog na nga.